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Review #257 of 365
Film: Haven (2006) [R] 115 minutes
WIP™ Scale: $6.00
Where Viewed: United Artists Denver Pavilions Stadium 15, Denver, CO
When 1st Seen: 25 September 2006
Time: 10:10 p.m.
Directed by: Frank E. Flowers
Written by: Frank E. Flowers
Featured Cast (Where You Might Remember Him/Her From):
Bill Paxton (Thunderbirds) • Orlando Bloom (Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest) • Stephen Dillane (Goal! The Dream Begins) • Zoe Saldana (Drumline) • Razaaq Adoti (Black Hawk Down) • Agnes Bruckner (Peaceful Warrior) • Victor Rasuk (Lords of Dogtown) • Lee Ingleby (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban) • Anthony Mackie (Half Nelson)
Click for 'Review Lite' [a 150-word or less review of this film]
Earning a not-so-wide release nearly two years after filming and Kingdom of Heaven, Elizabeth Town, and, of course, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest later in Orlando Bloom's career, this clunky film entitled, Haven, about tax fraud in the Cayman Islands has finally come to theatres. A word of advice, if you desire to see it, see it quick, it's not likely to last long. Of course, there's always the DVD where there will likely be extras to help make sense of the intricate plot. One has to wonder if it were not for Bloom's name twice in the credits for his role as Shy and as a co-producer, if this film would not have headed directly to DVD or late night Showtime® in the first place. It's not that it's a terrible film. The acting is decent, the locale is both beautiful and gritty, the directing and writing are ok, the music is good; but, and it's a huge but, the story's got some problems. First, it's told in a sort of Columbo-style, "here's the crime now we'll show you how it was done kind" of fashion. This worked really well for Columbo because the mystery was brilliant and the crime was incredible. It does not work so well for Haven because (a) the mystery is why Carl Ridley (Bill Paxton) yanked his daughter, Pippa (Agnes Bruckner) out of gym class in her Miami high school, and flew her straight to Grand Cayman after receiving a mysterious fax from the assistant of his Cayman Island banker, Mr. Allen (Stephen Dillane) which read "Feds are coming", and (b) the crime was apparently tax fraud. Neither of which come across as brilliant nor incredible.
"…about as satisfying as the average Saturday night movie of the week. "
Meanwhile, that's not all, because you'll notice no sign of Orlando Bloom. Actually, if you fall asleep at the wrong times in the movie, you might not ever see Orlando Bloom. Oh, don't worry, he's in the film, and he plays a big part of the giant 115-minute, cannot end its misery soon enough, long film. It's just funny because he's in the very first scene, and then you don't see him again for about 35 minutes or so. Which makes you wonder if he was just in the first scene so they could say he was in the film. No, no, there's no deception. He plays a native of the island who witnessed his father murdered when he was a little kid. This caused him to not want to speak for five years, and that's how Shy got his name. Shy, as it turns out, is painfully in love with Andrea (Zoe Saldana), the daughter of his boss. His boss really doesn't see Shy as dating material for his daughter. He makes a great deck hand, but he's not the sort of kid he would want his daughter to marry. Unfortunately for his plans, the two are very deeply in love. So, from the tax fraud and the Shy/Andrea relationship emerge the two main intermingled story lines of the film. It's a little unclear why anyone would decide to commingle these two stories, or why the storyline of the whole tax fraud thing would have been chosen in the first place. If Pippa had gotten into a love triangle with Shy and Andrea, maybe it would have made more sense. But, no, that doesn't happen. Instead, she hooks up with a different native of the island named Fritz (Victor Rasuk) who variously gets her in and out of severe trouble for her first few days on the island. Lots of different bad stuff happens in flashbacks in the days before Friday the 13th when everything comes to a head and a final confrontation between Shy and Andrea's brother, Hammer (Anthony Mackie) and the FBI and Mr. Ridley.
There's probably not a lot that could have been done differently to make this film any better that it was. There's nothing that ground breaking and the end result, while interesting how it all finally comes together, is about as satisfying as the average Saturday night movie of the week.
There's probably not a lot that could have been done differently to make this film any better that it was. There's nothing that ground breaking and the end result, while interesting how it all finally comes together, is about as satisfying as the average Saturday night movie of the week.
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Click for 'Review Lite' [a 150-word review of this film]
Click for 'Review Lite' [a 150-word review of this film]
Other Projects Featuring Haven (2006) Cast Members
Bill Paxton
• Orlando Bloom • Stephen DillaneZoe Saldana
• Razaaq Adoti • Agnes BrucknerVictor Rasuk
• Lee Ingleby • Anthony MackieOther Projects Involving Haven (2006) Music Composer
Heitor Pereira
Haven (2006) Review-lite [150-word cap]
Earning a not-so-wide release two years after filming and Kingdom of Heaven, Elizabeth Town, and Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest later in Orlando Bloom's career, this clunky film about tax fraud in the Cayman Islands called Haven has finally come to theatres. Were it not for Bloom's name in the credits it likely would have headed directly to DVD or late night Showtime®. It's not a terrible film. The acting is decent, the locale is both beautiful and gritty, the directing and writing are ok, the music is good; however, the story's got some problems as it commingles the tale of a father's tax evasion crisis and an unrelated, mismatched-love story. There's not much that could have been done to make this film any better. Without something ground breaking the end result, while interesting, is about as satisfying as the average Saturday night movie of the week.
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